This blog post reflects on my journey of navigating girlhood through a challenging relationship with my mother. It delves into how my upbringing shaped my identity and the lessons I learned as a parent about fostering curiosity and self-discovery in my children. Ultimately, it highlights the importance of support, love, and connection that comes with embracing one's true self.

In reflecting on my journey, I realize that the pursuit of freedom has been a significant theme in my life. Expanding from childhood escapades to adult choices, this quest has shaped my understanding of self-discovery and belonging.

I took a few days off — diving with whales and seals, wandering, eating fresh food, driving by the sea. 🌊 It’s been so long since I did something only for myself. Part of me still feels selfish. But the other part? Alive, open, and seeing life through a new lens.

At the ICF Philippines DEIB event, I was reminded of a lesson from my acting days: shed what’s mine to make space for another. 🎭 In coaching, this means pausing before every session to notice my biases and emotions, park them, and later ask where they come from. 🌱 The more I understand myself, the freer I am to hold space for someone else — not just in theory, but in presence and respect for uniqueness.

I wasn’t attending the training — I was working at it. But even from the sidelines, what I heard and absorbed changed everything. The lessons on self-awareness, leadership, and communication didn’t just stay in the workshop. They followed me home, cracked open truths I had been avoiding, and ultimately gave me the courage to walk away from a life that was no longer mine.

Pretending drains your energy. Performing your life isn’t the same as living it. Here’s what happened when I stopped.