✨ The Moment I Realised I Was Growing
- Crystal Chu
- Jun 5
- 2 min read
Updated: 5 days ago
The moment I stepped into facilitation work, I thought I was there to help others grow.
To hold space.
To guide.
To create transformation.
What I didn’t realise was that the biggest transformation would be my own.
When you stand in front of a room, listening deeply and witnessing people rediscover their voice, something shifts. You can’t help but look inward. You can’t help but start to see your own patterns, your own silences, your own compromises.
I’ll never forget one of my earliest sessions. I came home feeling lit up—like I had touched something true. I shared what I’d learned with my then-husband, hoping to connect, to share the insight.
His response? Dismissive.
“Who did you talk to?” he asked.
He laughed it off. “Sounds like the kind of fluff they make us do at work for CPD.”
At that moment, it wasn’t just what he said—it was what I felt. A wall. A refusal. A disconnect I could no longer explain away.
For a long time, I’d made excuses for the lack of emotional depth, the subtle undermining, the absence of curiosity. But now I had something to compare it to. I had witnessed people choose growth—and I knew, deep down, that he wasn’t choosing it with me.
That realisation cracked something open in me.
Not all at once. Growth is rarely that clean. But over time, the gap between who I was becoming and who I had been became impossible to ignore.
And here’s the truth no one tells you:
Sometimes growth means outgrowing.
Sometimes healing means letting go.
Sometimes the work leads you right back to the thing you’ve been avoiding all along—yourself.
That journey—messy, beautiful, and painful at times—has become the heart of the work I now do.
I’m not here just because I have a certificate or tools (though I do).
I’m here because I lived it.
Because I know how it feels to dim your light to keep the peace.
And I know how liberating it is to finally reclaim your voice.
So if you’re standing in that in-between place—where your inner world is expanding but your outer world feels like it’s resisting—you’re not alone.
You’re not crazy.
You’re not selfish.
You’re not too much.
You’re growing. And that’s sacred work.
Want support on your own journey?
I offer 1:1 coaching and group facilitation spaces where growth, truth, and self-trust are always welcome.
