My Dad’s Birthday Is on Halloween 🎃 — And I’m Learning to Let Go

My dad’s birthday is coming up. It’s on Halloween 🎃. Every year, I try not to think about how old he would’ve been if he hadn’t passed.

The truth is, we didn’t have a relationship when he died — that was his choice. And yet, I think I missed the idea of him more than the person himself. It’s strange how we can crave what we never actually had.

He wasn’t a good parent. His absence probably shaped my childhood — maybe for the better, maybe for the worse. I don’t really know. You don’t miss what you never had.

Still, there’s this ache. I’m not sure I’ll ever forgive him for walking out of my life, for how unloved he made me feel.

But healing, I think, is about reclaiming the narrative. I have to believe it was his loss — because I am a fucking delight to have around. 💁🏻‍♀️

And maybe that’s what this season reminds me of every year — grief and growth can coexist. 🎭